Tuesday, February 20, 2007

There is a time to say byebye to love ones,not because you dont want to see their faces or hear from them again but to move on to a greater thing.I have received quite a lot of mails and e-cards from my friends and otherwise out there and i must say i appreciate them all.I ve made up my mind to leave my past life and begin afresh with another focuss,knowing that iam specially created by God and should not shortchange myself bcos of societal pressure.The lady i met the other day at the eatery introduced me to a better life through christ and i have dedicated my life to him and with his grace,all my heart desire will be fulfilled. Once again,a big thank you to all and i wish you all the very best in your endeavours.

Tuesday, February 06, 2007

He was in my office yesterday evening,looking downcasted as if the world is falling on him.I welcome him into my office but as soon as the door was shut,i told him he should keep off me and give me space to clear my head before listening to any story.He was adamant and refused to leave without making me understand some things which he tried to tell me the other day when i met his wife in his house but that i did not allowed hin to clear any misgiving i had.He started his story by telling me how they met through his friend from school and before he knows it,they were married nine months after and they were so much in love and how her parent assisted them and were instrumental to his starting his own business and with their contact,he was able to make a headway and he will forever be grateful to them but on their own side,the issue of infertility has been a problem and they consulted different doctors but nothing happened and after eight years and the pressure was much on both of them from his and her parent and it got to a point that his wife agreed that he should try elsewhere but he didnt want to do that but you know men will always be men and along the line,a girl got impregnated and he couldnt do anything than to accept and he got a boy from the affair and thats the boy i saw his photograph .It was tough for him to tell his wife but he did and since then,their relationship is never the same until one day she decided that she want to call the marriage off and after much pleading from various quarters even her family,he got home one day and realised that she is gone. He later got to know she relocated to the states and was surprise to received her lawyer's letter and he never contested it and decided to move on untill she surface from nowhere the last time i saw her in his house and since they are not formally divorce ,the house belong to her as well.He said he is really sorry for the embarrassment and know that time will take care of all that and that he really want to be with me!i did not know what to make of the whole story and i just said i still need the space and i will call him when i feel better and ready to discuss.

Monday, February 05, 2007

I think i need to go for a deliverance this year as all kind of things i never envisage keep happening in my life.After the last episode with my oga's wife,i deliberately refuse to have contact with him until he sort himself out with his wife and iam sure she is not going to embarrass me again.Alas,a bigger one was in stock for me-after my friend got back and with the way his parent accepted me,i took it for granted that probably all he is been saying were actually true but yesterday the wife sister saw us at a eatery in V/I and was coming towards our direction but my friend met her halfway and before i knew it,she started shouting that you this ingrate,if you think you can just use my sister and dump her-you are in for a joke and you better tell that slut with you to start running because i will embarrass her throughly and i was alarmed,i wondered whats my business with their matter.My friend just politely asked me to get a cab that he will meet at home,imagine that shame in a public place and as i was going out she increased her drama as she saw that everybody there was looking out for the offender.Yeye girl,old mama,go and look for your own husband and stop hypnotising other people husband-humiliation was an understatement and all my friend could say was respect yourself and stop embarrasing my guest.All eyes were on me as i was rushing out but luckily a good samaritan offered to drop me anywhere to get me out of the place.As i entered the car,i just started crying and telling the lady the story of my life,how can the world be so cruel to me-all i want is my own happiness and not to hurt anybody.The lady allowed me to cry and narrate all my story but just said you have to take heart,we are all passing through one frustration or the other and i should not let it weigh me down,she dropped me in my house and we exhange our cards.When i got home.i just switched off the phone and off all the light.

Monday, January 29, 2007

My friend got back saturday night and was at the airport to picked him.On our way from the airport,he noticed that i was aloof somehow and wanted to know why and why my mood have been somehow after i got back to Nigeria and i just told him to give me time and that i will tell him at the appropriate time but i know that i will never tell him as its not his business and need not know everything that happened to me.

We got to his place and noticed that everywhere looked calm and he himself is relaxed and i concluded his madam might have gone back or not around.I followed him inside and he asked me to come to his room which i told him i was okay and he tried to play loverboy role but wasnt impressed as i still have a lot of issues to deal with including his case.He wanted me to sleepover but i declined,he later suggested we go to our family church tomorrow so that after the service,we can go and see his parent and mine and he can give them their gift and just said okay and left.

As soon as i got in,my landline rang and i picked it and he was sounding lovey and why i just like treating him anyhow and he believe that after all we shared during the holiday we have move beyond just friendship to something deeper but it seems something is holding me back and i told him nothing and that i just needed my space.He wanted to start about his wife issue if thats whats bothering me but i just told him we can discuss that another day and will appreciate it if we suspend the discussion and he took the clue that i wasnt in good mood for that.

Everything went well on sunday except that the parent were just doing as if iam already their wife and trust my mother to encourage them.I was just smilling all through like a new wife and he commented on that on our way home and i just said is that not what he want and he said yes madam.Iam just so confuse,putting myself in dicey situations.I dont want to bring his wife issue up so quick as i want him to sort out himself without pushinmg but i need to know where i stand and move on with my life no matter how painful.

Friday, January 26, 2007

The big oga got back yesterday night and called from the airport to know whether iam in the right frame of mind to talk to him since he is being trying to talk to me on phone and i refused to picked his calls and i just said he can go ahead if he has anything to say to me.He started blabbing on how he never expected his wife to go that far from what his sister told him and he is really upset with her but i should give him time to sort it out and she must definately apologise to me for the embarrasssment! and that i must know that if he was around she dare not do that nonsense.I just cut him short and told him to tell his wife that i do not have any business with her and as such,she should stay clear of me and if not,she is not going to find it funny as iam not that stupid to have taking it lightly with her and just dropped the call without waiting for his response.

I was suprised to see him at my door about an hour later and since i dont want the busybody around to listen to whatever we had to say,i had to allowed him in.As soon as he entered,he just held me and went on his knee that i should just forgive him and forget the whole episode and that he will make up for it.I was really embarrassed and had to tell him to just get up and talk like adult,i mean-men are just selfish and will do anything to get whatever they want.Forgive and forget indeed!with all the embarassment she put me through and you can imagine how the people on my street will be looking at me and making snide remarks.He left when he realised i wasnt ready to listen to all his cock and bull story but despite all my bravado,that man is damn too good to me and cant just be abandon anyhow-i think i care about him him more than i think i do because immediately he stepped out,i felt like calling him back and comfort him......................................shoooooooo

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Despite all the negative comments i got on my last two posts,i still have to document the update.My girl friend was in my house on friday on her way home from office,she said she called my office and was told i called in sick and she tried to reached me on my cell but was switched off and she was so worried.She was able to bring me out of that mood and she even joke that the woman was too lenient with me,that she should just have given me a mark to remember her for life and later asked me to follow her to her aunty's 60th birthday on saturday and i accepted to make her know that i have put that in the past.

Alas,my problem just began.I got to her house as scheduled and her hussy decided that two of us should go to the party and he, goes to his friend's own.We got there as the party was just picking up and sat with her other cousins and enjoying ourselves as her other friends were there too and as i just looked up,i saw the woman and as if by telepathy she saw me too and was pointing to me and all her friends were looking towards our direction.I called my friend attention to it and she just said i should just ignored her and i was like maybe we should leave before she create any scene.My friend assured me that she will not do that as she is educated and she has made her point to me and she wouldnt want to ridicule herself.Before we know what was happening,she and her friends have moved towards our canopy but my friend was just reassuring me that she cant do anything but as they got to our table,they just started singing abusive songs and as if they planned it,the musician started praising her and telling all her enemies to jump into lagoon and if they think they can take her husband-won kere si no yen.There was nothing they did not do to provoked me but i kept calm but resolve within myself that i will show her that i hold the ace.We left the place without bidding her aunty bye.

On our way back to her place,my friend asked me to pick her husband call anytime he calls as my refusing to picked his calls might be disastrous as we never know what she can do again and somebody have to call her to order.By the time we got to her house,her hussy was still in and she narracted what happened to him and he was like i should just take it easy that when the man comes he will know what to do but me no say na beginning of the battle.
Its been hectic for the last two days as i had to go for a conference in ogere and by the time we finished for the day,iam always so tired that to think of writting will be like a burden but its worth it as i learnt a lot and met quite a lot of professionals from different fields and it really broaden my knowledge and i enjoyed the discussions.What else can i say than thank you oh lord-i have good health,good job and iam believing for other good things of life to make me a complete woman.

I must not forget to say a big thank you to all my friends out there who drop a line or two to either condemn or just advice me that i appreciate them and pray that their daughters or themselves will never be in a position that will make them live the way i do(Amen).Its very easy to condemn especially married women who preaches righteousness,yes they are married and have every right to proctect their territory but also,dont forget that some of us never plan to be a second fiddle to anybody but life draw up all kind of challenges.When i decided to make my diary public,i expected different reactions but iam glad,i dont bottle up my feelings again and it makes life easier for me as in the process,i meet quite a lot of genuine friends who offers advice and some even pray with me but i belief its a free world and for now i remain who iam and not who you think iam.

Friday, January 19, 2007

I had to call in sick today as iam in a terrible mood and dont want to take that to office and just be snapping on everybody around.Can you imagine that the woman have the gut to call my house yesterday night again?only God knows how she got my number.She just started screaming and calling me all sort of names and that her informant told her she never knew i wasnt related to her husband and that she has seen him on several occassions on his way from or to my house and the explanation he gave the first time was that he came to see his niece and she believed him.She even said she is ready to go any length to get her man and if i love my life,i should stay clear.I just held on to the phone,listening to her nonsense talk and when she saw that i wasnt saying anything,she just said you will hear from me and dropped in annoyance.

As soon as i dropped the phone,i called oga's sister to tell her what their wife did to me and that they should warn her to stop harrassing me if she doesnt want me to call the police and that its out of respect for the family not her that i have restrained myself from giving it to her,afterall i didnt force her husband and in any case if she is that good,her husband wouldnt be running after me.She should go and examine herself and make amends and sort out herself with her husband and not me because she has no business with me and if she doesnt take it easy,i will now reconsider my stand against her husband.The woman pleaded with me to take it easy and will call his brother to call me and she promise she will never do that again.I now understand my mother feeling towards my earlier stand on my oga-haba!